Pale Girls at the Grammys

First of all, sorry for the delay in posting. I have been working on my Etsy store, VikingBeautyVintage, and have been doing a fair amount of writing for my book (yes, I am planning on publishing).

In return for putting up with my absence, I will give you a post chock full of Grammy Awards victories and fails as well as a surprise at the end. :)

 Alison Krauss

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Let's face it: country musicians are not known for good fashion sense. See: Twain, Shania; Chicks, Dixie; Judd, Wynonna and Naomi. Having said that, I do wonder why Alison here is wearing a hand-crocheted capelet/baby afghan. Mostly, when I see it I just wonder why. What is this piece actually doing? It's certainly not keeping her warm or camouflaging lumpy upper arms. It does look like a quality item, but I'm more concerned that she robbed the back of a nursery school sofa. what is this piece actually doing?

Joy Williams

I admit that I have no idea whether this lady is a solo act or part of a group and I don't know what types of music she sings. I'm going to go out on a limb and say country, because she seems to have a bit of Alison Krauss-itis. By which I mean that she appears to have stolen a wee lacy item, but this time she took it to make herself a Barbie's First Funeral gown. Points for keeping the makeup light.

Shelly Mooring of the band Leeland

No idea about this lady, either. To tell the truth I'm not a huge music fan, which is probably why I only recognize the people that I've seen on SNL. Regardless, this broad looks like she went a little too far with 'cutesy-goth' and ended up with 'I had a buy 10 get 1 free coupon at Hot Topic'.

Mika Newton

Allegedly, this one is an actress. She has clearly followed the funeral costume trend but, instead she decided to dress as the tartlet seen faking tears over her rich, 80 year-old lover's grave while trying to sneak a peek at the will.

Cyndi Lauper

Cyndi Lauper as a menopausal tartlet and the dead man's former wife.

Bonnie Raitt

Bonnie here is awesome. Great voice and cool personal style with the little swatch of white hair. Very classy. I just wish she hadn't purchased her attire at a sale at SteinMart. I don't mind the pants so much I guess, but I do find them rather casual for THE GRAMMYS. The overgrown metallic sausage casing she squeezed herself into? Not so much.

Skylar Grey

I do not know her but I know I do not like her. 1) her hair is unforgivably flat, 2) she has caked on so much foundation that her skin looks like a wax figure, 3) she is matching her shoes to the carpet. And did I mention the lipstick? Dead dead dead. What with the Grammys and bringing out every one's morbid streak?

Katy Perry

Oh, well here's something decidedly not morbid. Katy does a lovely impression of a Smurf. Which is fitting since she voiced Smurfette in the movie. And yes, I know she's not pale in this picture ( I hope that's a spray tan, Katy), but she usually is so I figured I'd grandfather her in. I actually don't hate the blue hair on her. The dress makes me think of blue cotton candy, though, and then I start to feel slightly queasy.

Robyn

I love Robyn. She's funky and fun and sings dance pop and is from Sweden. She's like a sort of one woman ABBA in that I always want to dance to her songs whenever I hear them regardless of time or place appropriateness. And that's why I will give this a pass.

For more snarkily delicious Grammy commentary visit: The Fug Girls